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Posted: 2009-10-16 21:47
One of my subordinates cried very hard today in my office. We had a disagreement on the proper approach to an effort.
According to my wife, she believe this employee...female is frustrated because things are not going her way and I am calling her out.
Please provide your thoughts...and best approach when the tears begin to flow.
hrbth
Joined: Oct 24, 2002 Posts: 1501
Posted: 2009-10-19 06:40
What does your new HR rep say about this?
Also, what is your wife's role at your company?
cynbrandt
Joined: Nov 11, 2003 Posts: 1782
Posted: 2009-10-19 09:46
Hand over a box of Kleenex.
Most likely the employee is embarrassed by the outburst, and the less said about it the better. It's possible the crying is a mechanism to put off discussions about work performance, but I don't see how you could address the crying without coming off like a total jerk.
nork3
Joined: Feb 12, 2002 Posts: 3876
Posted: 2009-10-19 12:19
I'm certainly not a psychologist, but I'd guess this employee has other things going on in her life and your discussion with her was only the trigger for the breakdown, not necessarily the cause.
If your company has an EAP, I'd suggest you redirect her that way.
marcNV
Joined: Jun 30, 2004 Posts: 400
Posted: 2009-10-19 17:17
"There's no crying in baseball."
Tom Hanks, A League of Their Own.
sportscarguy99
Joined: Jul 10, 2009 Posts: 21
Posted: 2009-10-20 21:14
This employee has issues and I have HR in the loop the entire way. My wife has nothing to do with the company....
justasking
Joined: Nov 18, 2005 Posts: 50
Posted: 2009-10-23 14:23
Just my two cents, sometimes women cry when they are angry or frustrated. It doesn't have to mean anything deeper than that.
As difficult as crying in the workplace can be, it is generally more acceptable than when a woman shows anger. Of course it's best if men and woman manage their emotions in the workplace, but we are all human. I agree, it is best to ignore the crying and just focus on the issues themselves.
justasking
Joined: Nov 18, 2005 Posts: 50
Posted: 2009-10-23 14:33
Just to clarify, I didn't mean to ignore crying in general, just to not bring it up as part of the issue in subsequent meetings. Treat is as you would any other embarassing interaction, with sensativity.
But if you are in a meeting and a person starts bawling, maybe you could acknowledge that there must be some strong feelings associated with the conversation and maybe give the person an opportunity to reschedule the meeting or whatever might help make it more comfortable. Don't act like it's a big deal or something that needs to be fixed.
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Posted: 2009-10-16 21:47 
